I explain myself

Ok, a few comments on here have led me to understand that not everyone understands my vendetta against the current Australian captain. Frankly, I can't see how anyone could like him, unless they were a one-eyed Aussie, but maybe it's not that obvious to people who don't have to share a country with the bastard. Therefore I have decided to list ten reasons why Ricky Ponting does not have me on his fan list (I could have written a thousand, but I'm trying to clean the house at the moment).

1. He's a pretty dreadful captain. Despite being the "most successful" captain of all time, for about half of his current captaincy career, he was carried by Warne, McGrath and Gilchrist, a bunch of guys who could have pulled a win out of anything. Since the retirement of The Three, Ponting has been hardly successful as a captain, losing Test series' in India, England and at home to South Africa. Many of these losses can also be contributed to his lack of captaincy skills, as in the final overs in Cardiff, not picking Hauritz at the Oval, bowling his part-timers in India when the team needed to grasp the momentum and generally setting defensive fields in both Perth and Melbourne against the Saffers.
2. He's arrogant. I could get you quotes, I could get you voice clips, but I don't think I need to. Ponting barely acknowledges the opposition, you can always hear a sneer in his voice and, according to Kerry O'Keefe, his team doesn't acknowledge the fans enough, especially while on tour.
3. He has Small Man Syndrome. From punch-ups to talking big, (P)Ricky likes to impose himself on the opposition and anyone else who gets in his way. Unfortunately for him, he's about the size of a midget and just comes across as rather silly.
4. He throws tantrums. Think that only girls like Shane Watson throw tantrums? Think again. Stretch your mind back a few years to Trent Bridge, when he was run out by Gary Pratt (who really deserved an OBE for that). Then again, he was in good company in that series, as that determinedly masculine teammate Simon Katich also spat the dummy.
5. His appealing is appalling. He appeals for everything, and he's not even the bowler or wicketkeeper. He appeals for bump balls, non-existent nicks, LBWs pitching outside leg. I wouldn't be surprised if he appealed for a four, just in case. Not only that, but he looks repulsive while he does it.
6. He's the biggest bloody hypocrite around. Forget certain politicians and religious leaders, Ricky has this well-covered. For a man who has done more than any captain in recent memory to encourage his team to play contrary to the spirit of cricket, he is a great advocate of the philosophy and loves accusing opposition captains of not playing within the spirit. Thankfully no one listens to a word he says on this matter anymore.
7. He gets away with pretty much anything. In recent times, the only charge Ponting has been in risk of suspension for is slow over rates. However, this does not indicate a sanctimonious nature, but a bias on some part or another to let him get away with shoving opponents, abusing crowds, not controlling his players, celebrating Gayle's wicket just like Watson did, claiming catches that weren't, interrogating umpires, being plain rude on the podium at the presentation of the 2006 Champions Trophy and various other misdemeanours. Maybe they think, like a foolishly indulgent grandmother, that when Ponting does it it's cute?
8. He tarnishes the reputation of the men that went before him by projecting this kind of behaviour as a traditional Australian way of playing cricket. Steve Waugh played hard, but you never smelled arrogance in the air. Mark Taylor was a captain that any Australian would be proud to name as a countryman. Sadly, many young overseas fans will be thinking that all Australian teams are like our current one, and many young Australian fans will look to these "role-models" as a guide on how to conduct themselves on the field, when they represent their school, club and perhaps one day their country.
9. His minions ape him. A number of the newer members of the Australian line-up have had no indication given to them by him that boorish behaviour is unacceptable. Thankfully Hussey seems to be able to conduct himself with decorum, despite seeming slightly manic in all his actions. But Ponting's legacy will sadly take quite a few years to breed out.
10. He just is.

As for my dislike of Midge, that has a slightly different and less logical basis. It involves a Men of Cricket calendar, a crush, and someone I know rating him above AB de Villiers in sex appeal. I mean, the guy has hedges for eyebrows. How could you possibly be attracted to him over AB?